its simply grace

and again,
im thankful for the realisation who i am as a human being.
how much more i need Your grace in my life, Lord.
i dont think i can keep going on without it :")


everyday, looking at the cross.

pouring thoughts out

no i wouldnt complain about finding a job here, i know it isnt easy. people keep telling me try this and that; i said ill do it once at a time. but this whole thing somehow pressurizing me in such a weird way. again, it isnt about the few-seconds-of-fearful-thoughts i had before i call up some companies, neither because i short in cash *well this is half-true actually*, or maybe is it because people keep telling me to go back for good before i am even trying?

probably combination of all.

i know the biggest treasure in this universe isnt about an awesome career, or self-own shops, or those pretty clothes neither all of the other luxury the world offers. but it also doesnt mean we live carelessly, right? unplanned and impulsive at the same time.

i know im such a huge dreamer. my dreams probably are leaking out of me at this moment. and im okay with it actually. but again, it doesnt mean that i am just gonna sit idle here and hoping that the rest of my life would be just fine. and i do clearly know that what i still i want to pursue is seeing and knowing God more. His thoughts are way beyond my comprehension and His plan is the biggest. this will obviously include pushing myself to read books, spending more time in pondering His Words and taking a time out from whatever things that i can see with these eyes.

and probably before i declare my self as a true Christian, the thing that i need to pursue more now is Jesus Christ Himself. i dont want to be too late for this, if not, im screwed for an eternity :/

if the world we live in now, is this beautiful;
how much more is THE CREATOR!!!


guard and guide my heart Lord,
to see things beyond my worldly eyes.
things that You have prepared for me in Heaven (*:

1111

day one.

spent the whole day browsing through job search engines *.*
mabok.

for the good and the bad, i take it all.
happy mother's day mommiee!
*i love you* :*)

9:27

i am back to my melancholy corner.
a night with no real companion, well i got lala lili binx jeff claire gary here with me *yes they re stuffed toys* :D and john is singing for me too here. but others are away doing their own business. fair enough.

so i ask myself,

what do i do tomorrow? im still unsure. prolly i would enjoy my day in e computer labs sorting out documents for tr, could also be sitting on the grass and doing nothing. who knows.

finding out jobs.
doing sm more illustration works.
preparing docs for laser-cutting.

much to do.

and christmas is coming soon too.



so why do i still wander around here? i dont know. i just feel like dropping sm words here, to keep a record for myself that ive been to this very second of my life. another movie perhaps, soon.

or a cup of lavender tea?

its been 5 yrs, teman (:

friendship needs an effort too :D
thank God i have you.

oh found this! foto aib 3 taon lalu!