our mind.
too much of illusion and vague thinking.
Friday, February 26, 2010
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
this is not the end of everything
i might lose a huge opportunity to be a great great designer,
yet i am glad that i took the right decision of not going (:
i am still learning, DADDY.
yet i am glad that i took the right decision of not going (:
i am still learning, DADDY.
Sunday, February 21, 2010
how do i love stoopid moments
a few hours with good food and lovely friends. i kinda forgot abt whats been happening and relaxed myself abit.
i thank God for that.
i am ready for tomorrow (:
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
buat apa sih blog ini?
supaya gw bisa mengingat kembali gimana Tuhan uda begitu baik ama hidup gw, buat saat2 tersulit pun, gw bisa baca confession gw sendiri yang gw tau, gw tulis itu cuman dari conviction gw dalem hati,
from last yr wintercamp (:
tuesday / 07 july 2009
"..and yes, things do go wrong. but we believe that our God have a beautiful plan for our life eh?"
dan gw dikuatkan.
from last yr wintercamp (:
tuesday / 07 july 2009
"..and yes, things do go wrong. but we believe that our God have a beautiful plan for our life eh?"
dan gw dikuatkan.
Saturday, February 6, 2010
060210
2 hari menuju melbourne....
excited? setengah ya, setengah tidak.
setengah maleslah saya buat berpikir harus begini begitu di melbourne nanti. hati sedikit senang soalnya bisa keluyuran leluasa dan minum kopi enak. tapi hati juga sedikit berat meninggalkan surabaya tercinta. mama papa di sini, adek2 juga, adek asli dan adek hitam. huks.
sudah dua hari ini gw sakit kepala. entah karena penyakit super males yang kambuh jadinya tidur melulu dan menyebabkan kepala pusing, atau karena banyak sekali pikiran yang ada di otak sampe kayaknya beneran kerasa otak ini akan meledak berkeping2, atau ya emang rada ga beres juga terpengaruh sugesti dari si dokter bedah.
sepertinya sih yang pertama.
kemaren juga ketemu sama temen lama dan kita ngobrol ngalor ngidul tentang masa depan. apa aja yang mau kita lakukan, apa aja yang mau kita usahakan. dan kita tampak tegang dan bingung. beban itu sudah sungguh nyata bagi kita2 anak ingusan yang udah umur 22, dikejar umur dan hati nurani, untuk jadi anak yang sedikit lebih bertanggung jawab sama dirinya sendiri. tidak gampang.
betapalah duid menjadi poin penting dari semuanya itu dan gw semakin sadar kenapa orang2 gila harta itu eksis di dunia ini. karena mereka terseret obsesi dirinya sendiri. mereka lupa apa yang sebenernya jadi esensi dalam kehidupan itu. lebih dari uang.
sudah sering gw malem2 nggak bisa tidur cepet gara2 kebanyakan mikir. pikiran di otak gw melayang-layang memenuhin semua ruang 3 dimensi di kamar gw. sampe pake acara denger lagu rohani yang gw pikir bisa menenangkan. dasar ellen bodoh.
duduk di jok belakang mobil di sebelah kaca, memandangi orang2 dan pohon2 sepanjang perjalanan bikin gw selalu bertanya2 sama Tuhan. Tuhan sebenernya ellen harus gimana ya? banyak banget hal-hal yang nggak pasti di hidup ini. dan gw uda liat sendiri gimana Tuhan selalu nolong ellen di saat-saat tersulit sekalipun, tapi kok tampaknya, semakin lama semakin susah ya?
tapi,
aku tau Engkau gak berenti bekerja sampe di sini doank, Tuhan.
Isaiah 55:6-9
Seek the Lord while He makes Himself available; call to Him while He is nearby! The wicked need to abandon their lifestyle and sinful people their plans. They should return to the Lord, and He will show mercy to them, and to their God, for He will freely forgive them. “Indeed, my plans are not like your plans, and my deeds are not like your deeds,for just as the sky is higher than the earth, so my deeds are superior to your deed and my plans superior to your plans.
i just want to believe.
excited? setengah ya, setengah tidak.
setengah maleslah saya buat berpikir harus begini begitu di melbourne nanti. hati sedikit senang soalnya bisa keluyuran leluasa dan minum kopi enak. tapi hati juga sedikit berat meninggalkan surabaya tercinta. mama papa di sini, adek2 juga, adek asli dan adek hitam. huks.
sudah dua hari ini gw sakit kepala. entah karena penyakit super males yang kambuh jadinya tidur melulu dan menyebabkan kepala pusing, atau karena banyak sekali pikiran yang ada di otak sampe kayaknya beneran kerasa otak ini akan meledak berkeping2, atau ya emang rada ga beres juga terpengaruh sugesti dari si dokter bedah.
sepertinya sih yang pertama.
kemaren juga ketemu sama temen lama dan kita ngobrol ngalor ngidul tentang masa depan. apa aja yang mau kita lakukan, apa aja yang mau kita usahakan. dan kita tampak tegang dan bingung. beban itu sudah sungguh nyata bagi kita2 anak ingusan yang udah umur 22, dikejar umur dan hati nurani, untuk jadi anak yang sedikit lebih bertanggung jawab sama dirinya sendiri. tidak gampang.
betapalah duid menjadi poin penting dari semuanya itu dan gw semakin sadar kenapa orang2 gila harta itu eksis di dunia ini. karena mereka terseret obsesi dirinya sendiri. mereka lupa apa yang sebenernya jadi esensi dalam kehidupan itu. lebih dari uang.
sudah sering gw malem2 nggak bisa tidur cepet gara2 kebanyakan mikir. pikiran di otak gw melayang-layang memenuhin semua ruang 3 dimensi di kamar gw. sampe pake acara denger lagu rohani yang gw pikir bisa menenangkan. dasar ellen bodoh.
duduk di jok belakang mobil di sebelah kaca, memandangi orang2 dan pohon2 sepanjang perjalanan bikin gw selalu bertanya2 sama Tuhan. Tuhan sebenernya ellen harus gimana ya? banyak banget hal-hal yang nggak pasti di hidup ini. dan gw uda liat sendiri gimana Tuhan selalu nolong ellen di saat-saat tersulit sekalipun, tapi kok tampaknya, semakin lama semakin susah ya?
tapi,
aku tau Engkau gak berenti bekerja sampe di sini doank, Tuhan.
Isaiah 55:6-9
Seek the Lord while He makes Himself available; call to Him while He is nearby! The wicked need to abandon their lifestyle and sinful people their plans. They should return to the Lord, and He will show mercy to them, and to their God, for He will freely forgive them. “Indeed, my plans are not like your plans, and my deeds are not like your deeds,for just as the sky is higher than the earth, so my deeds are superior to your deed and my plans superior to your plans.
i just want to believe.
Thursday, February 4, 2010
gara2 joel bwahahah
Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.
The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You like serious, smart and determined people. You don't judge a book by its cover, so good-looking people aren't necessarily your style. This makes you an attractive person in many people's eyes.
Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.
The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.
Your views on education
Education is very important in life. You want to study hard and learn as much as you can.
The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.
How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.
What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.
Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.
source: http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx
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