bold love

when it is getting harder everyday to love life..

remember that there is someone who always puts up with you no matter what.

it is God (:

remember the cross?

it takes bold love to do that.

my old man

my everyday's highlight

and another thing is, i found this looovely baking blog - nom!

check it out, it's on your right hand side (:

i loved you, rosa.

You dream of everlasting love, but not me. 
Despite the horror and the sorrow, I love our world. 
I want us all to live. What matters is that we'll live.

lagi demen :>

it never gets too old

If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 

If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have love, I am nothing.

If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast, but do not have love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 

It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.
Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. 

But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away.

For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when completeness comes, what is in part disappears. 

When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a 

child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me. 

For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. 

But the greatest of these is love.

1 Corinthians 13:1-13

xx

above all

i knew it's coming. i knew that this is not something that is unexpected.

i want to admit that i let myself to drift away from Daddy lately. i, somehow, managed to entertain myself in a way that did not involve Him. i even started to see life just as it is -- never easy and messy, deal with it. i chose not to think over things that are important, because if it's real important, it is scary and it demands my responsibility and i have to make that accountable as well to either other people or God. it is too hard, i do not want to deal with it. i started to live my life daily as it is, which is not bad. i would say the days were horribly bleak nor jolly. but i definitely know, they felt empty. my soul felt empty (even when i know, He is still with me).

salvation is for all, but our faith is individual. no one can ever come up to others and blame them of what they did not believe. or simply by measuring others' faith based on what one sees. our eyes are limited, we all know that. there is, of course, tangible things that show how Christ lives in one's life, but who can tell what is in one's heart?

okay, let's just say, i feel like i made a lots of mistakes lately. i do not think i have been the best version of myself, well, there is no best-me anyway! silly brain. but well hey, the truth is, God's love to me is never depend on my spiritual behaviours -- if i do good, He loves me more; if i am being naughty, He won't love me as much -- no! it is not like that. He is love itself.

i somehow got frustrated with myself, knowing that how much i have heard the truth, but my flesh keeps giving in to sin. i know the truth, but i still need grace and mercy every single second!

they all say, keep yourself busy with work here - that will keep you sane.

i agree to that to some degree, because somehow, despite my love to all of those inanimate objects, fine clothes and good movies; they never let me stop. brutally said, they eat me in.

i love cool things. who does not? but sometimes, cool things are not always right. and the right things to do are sometimes the ones that i thought is lame. lets just throw this ego away. it drags me down, and leave me cocky all alone.

i do not want to cry out to God, when it is Christmas nor Easter. when every songs and sermons at church gets me teary or when the fairy lights makes me to ponder about life deeper. i do not want that.

i need you now, Daddy. i need you now.