"While Paul engaged Lydia through her intellect, the slave girl through spiritual power, he engages the jailer through a living witness to a miracle."
the devotional was taken from Acts 16:20-34, where Paul and Silas were taken to Roman prison because of their teachings (and previously, when he met Lydia and the demon-possessed girl). God worked through Paul and Silas, to save those people. The Gospel grabbed a hold on them in different ways, all to serve one purpose: to set them free, for them to receive salvation.
but, no, i am not going to talk about Paul today.
i think i could relate myself so well with the jailer. why?
okay. back to the chapter a bit:
v. 25-28
about midnight Paul and Silas were praying and singing hymns to God, and the other prisoners were listening to them. suddenly there was such a violent earthquake that the foundations of the prison were shaken. at once all the prison doors flew open, and everyone’s chains came loose. the jailer woke up, and when he saw the prison doors open, he drew his sword and was about to kill himself because he thought the prisoners had escaped. But Paul shouted, “Don’t harm yourself! We are all here!”
the jailer was a regular person with regular job, he has one purpose, one responsibility: to guard the prison. but when he taught he failed on his job, he immediately wanted to kill himself. he panicked and lost his purpose all at once.
i thought like that too.
sometimes i put on my own-fabricated identity as a person. i define myself to be as such and such. i am this kind of person with this kind of job, and i have this kind of personality and i always like this and that. and worse is, sometimes i acted that i am a good Christian -- even though i know i am not *jrengjrengggg* i created a persona of myself so that people perceive me as i want to be perceived. and of course, mostly it is something good (my standard).
problem is, when life throws me some problems, giving me difficulties or i simply slacking on doing what i planned to do; this best me would all shattered at once. either i would have a mental breakdown, or i became very negative and pity myself a lot. i would feel like i disappoint, i fail miserably, i can't be responsible.
why?
because i placed my identity on things i created myself. and they are vain, i tell you. creation can not mend itself -- only the creator can. sometimes it is very easy for us to forget our new identity in Christ. we are children of God, royal priesthood, created in His own image, chosen people, holy nation... should we then really live this rather than just knowing it?
(and yeah, really, do we really believe and live the word of God? do we?)
yes God has so many ways engaging us through many things, i know that He will be the one who constantly grabbing my hand when i am out of focus or shifted away from Him. He completely knows that i am sinful person, He knows my weaknesses. but His countless ways of saying 'come to me, nearer, nearer' have always amazed me and take me back to where i should be. the more i know how fickle i am as a human, the more i see His ABUNDANT GRACE and UNENDING LOVE to my life. this is just too overwhelming as always, how could He loves me so much?
thus, it doesn't mean that i would just be sitting pretty.
what could possibly be more important is
(more than) to know the Word,
live it.
and as always, we will find Him there.
thank you Daddy for your love, stays.
xx
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