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the cross

masih inget kan sama movie 'the passion of the christ' yang nyeritain perjalanan Tuhan Yesus d kayu salib.. merinding.. ga tega.. ga berani liat.. adalah reaksi2 saya waktu nonton. cuman saya mikirnya, iya sakitt bgt yah pasti digituin.. tanpa saya tau sakitnya gimana..

hari ini, saya melakukan tindakan bodoh:
motong cardboard pake penggaris plastik!

raaf baru dateng masuk k kelas sambil bawa sekardus cardboards, pva glue, kuas2, botol dan setumpuk plester. dia bilang 'in case we need it!' kita semua cuman ketawa kecil. 15 menit kemudian kita uda sibuk sama motong memotong cardboard. begitu juga saya. tebak apa yang terjadi tiba2, cutter kecil saya yang pada waktu itu saya teken kuat2 soalnya mo motong cardboard, nyelonong k jari dan kuku saya. 'ouch!' xisc langsung noleh dan bilang, 'buruan siram aer len' lalu saya lari2 k toilet luar.

dengan gaya nggak panik, saya teken2 jari dan darahnya biar mampet. ternyata, gak berenti2! masi belum panik saya siram air, tapi lho kok keran aer nya panas. akirnya lari2 k ruang dapur dan pake sink d sana. belom berenti darahnya. hmm. masi ga panik. rada segen gara2 darah saya berceceran d lantai toilet, ntar ada orang masuk mala dia panik. untung saya inget! raaf bawa plester. saya comot beberapa dan si raaf masi aja nawarin 'mau gua plesterin engga?' drpd dia shock liat jari berdarah2 saya bilang, engga. balik k toilet dan saya plester lah jari malang ini.

lanjut potong2 cardboard dan excursion serta ngafe kemudian. *gila ya ini orang*

pulang, saya rencana ganti plester dan kasi antiseptik. NAH ini baru, saya PANIK!
takut ntar kukunya ketarik sekalian, takut dagingnya ketarik dan lukanya tamba gede, takut sakit, takut infeksi, takut jarinya cacat. gila, parno.

setelah sesi gulung2 dan whining selesai, saya tiba2 kepikiran: gmn pas Tuhan Yesus disalib? oh goshh gak bisa bayangin sakitnyaaaa... muatenggg... ini baru jari ellen, baru jari.. klo sebadan? sekepala? bayangin aja uda takut. dan ini ellen, ini salah kamu. motong cardboard kok pake penggaris plastik? dan Tuhan Yesus, salah apa? engga salah apaa2.... justru salahnya kita Dia yang nanggung. jadi kitanya diampuni, bahkan dibebasin dr dosa. seGITU sayangnya Dia ama kita. seGIMANAkah kita sayangnya ama Dia?

bahkan mungkin luka jari yang sekecil ini ngga cukup ngampuni dosa saya yang kuecil. darah saya ngga seberharga darahnya Tuhan. sigh. saya jadi bener2 keinget, buat ngehargai salib itu sendiri, lebih dr pajangan2 salib yang ada, lebih dr gantungan bentuk salib yang ada, salib itu sendiri adalah bentuk cinta Tuhan sama kita. the greatest love, ever!!!


so, thank you Lord for the cross. really really, thank you! (:
ps. Tuhan minta bleedingnya berenti donk, sakitt huhu..

when will you laugh?

when there's something that is really really really reaaaally funny!

fact: 5 out of 9 ppl in carlton 4 are tone-deaf.
lovelies! :p

maaf saya gak gaul

pusing dan capek adalah kata2 yg tepat buat bbrp hari belakangan ini.

uni emang ga sesibuk semester kemaren, gw jalan ga sebanyak taon lalu, ngomel tidak sebanyak taon lalu, pergi tidak sesering dulu, shopping apalagi. dalem hati gw uda resolusi sama diri sendiri biar jadi orang yang lebih tau diri, lebih berpikir panjang gtu ceritanya.

hari2 berlalu cepet banget, kayaknya sehari itu cepet banget abisnya. tau2 uda siang tau2 uda sore, eh uda mo dinner, eh kudu hrs tidur lagi. tapi yang aneh gw rada2 kehilangan kemampuan gw begadang. jm 12 malem gw uda ko-it, capee bgt, dan jem 8 an besoknya gw udah bangun. LHO? gw kok normal?

uni tidak semenarik dulu, gw jadi rada ga minat ngerjain. yang bikin gw seneng palingan gw sekarang bisa knitting teknik dasar kayak emak2. yg lain? kurang bikin gw seneng. haishh. tapi tidak, gw belum nyerah. ini masih week 3, masih ada waktu. gw kangen sama comlab, sama workshop, sama prototyping.

.....


ah, masih banyak len,
tapi saya pumped up!
library labs projects here i comee :D

ini lagu gw uda tau dr jaman gw sd, dr buku nyanyian rohani pppk petra. tapi br tadi gw ngerti maksudnya...

I don't know about tomorrow
I just live from day to day
And I don't borrow from the sunshine
'Cause the skies might turn to gray.

And I don't worry about the future
'Cause I know what Jesus said
And today I'm gonna walk right beside him
'Cause he's the one who knows what is ahead.

There are things about tomorrow
That I don't seem to understand
But I know who holds tomorrow
And I know who holds my hand.

And each step is getting brighter
As the golden stairs I climb
And every burden is getting lighter
And all the clouds, their silver line.

And, I'll bet the sun it's always shining
And no tears will ever dim the eye
And the ending of the rainbow
Where the mountains, they touch the sky.

There are many things about tomorrow
I don't seem to understand
But I know who holds tomorrow
And I know who holds my hand.

the greatest artist of all

i found this afternoon pretty chilly. i had work today and felt absolutely tired *mama minta pijiiiit* since my body hasnt become 'tahan banting' yet. i went to balcony, dragged three stools out, made a cup of nice hot tea then indulged myself watching the scenery of people walking and reading mx and again, knitting. nyaaaahh~

a bit later on, when the dawn came, the sky once again intrigued me. i simply love the color, how the sun light is reflected to clouds in its surroundings. and it is be-a-u-ti-ful! and a great thing about it is: this masterpiece of art is not kept in those museums and guarded by security but our Lord gives it to everyone of us, every-single-day, for FREE.

isnt He kind? (:

details in friendship

close friends are just irreplaceable.
thank God i have you as mine (:

ga jelas, but i like

ive been spending my night browsing old-indo-pop songs in youtube which i found them pretty relaxing. if you asked me what kind of music i like, i dont know. but at least i know im not into metal and trance. well, it may help to define me abit.


jadul, cute!

btw i got my part time job already! thank God! spreading my resumes ard city in the last 2 days, finally did something for me. im occupied. well, and this one was actually my last job a year ago. i texted my boss if she had any vacancy, then 10 mins later she called me and asked me to come next week. i quit my job early last year since uni's workload was extremely insane. but, now? i only have uni 8 hours per week! crazy eh?

not very excited for my studio tho. to begin is not easy. but it ll work somehow, i just need to put myself back into it. i ll go for library and labs tomorrow. yayy! nerding time! oh ellen dont forget to bring your knitting tools as well.

okay, plan tomorrow. i ll bake lemon-blueberry cupcakes early in morning, then uni, then i dont know, chilling time maybe; coffee and grass. im just hoping it ll rain in the morning and the sun ll come afterwards later on. boooo selfish.

interuption! sister, have i done any improvement in my writting skills? if not, i need to read one of your books, the one with fancy languange. sigh. im almost 22 and most of the time i just read poket gober bebek. retarded. gyaa. help.

i am lili.
lili is me.

*mulai sinting*


nah, im alright. i just cant wait to walk my journey this year with God. there must be smth greater. commitment, yes.




thank you Lord that i am what i am today,
may You always be my guide in life,
for i am nothing without You (:

mukya!

i love lights! hyahya